Thursday, September 26, 2013

Profile update

When I first got back into this a few days ago, I saw that my profile said I was a "temporarily derailed dissertator."  Boy, that's how I defined myself.  No wonder I took time off.  Nothing has held me back more than thinking I'd get around to that again sooner or later.  For some reason, when I got back, I only took out the word "temporarily".  Yes, I didn't finish that dissertation.  No, I'm not going to.  I might write something eventually, other than Facebook posts and this thing.  But I recently found that writing something for anthropologists was really rough on me.  At first, it was exciting, then daunting, then paralyzing.  So I clearly have a lot of work to do on that, psychologically.  So, no.  I'm not going to define myself as a failure, which is what that sounded like.  If I write something, it probably won't be for peer review.  I love anthropology, I love my area(s) of study, and I would have loved the dissertation at one point.  Actually, I love writing.  But the big F in Failure looms large and I don't want it to get me again.  I'm successful at what I do, in whatever way I choose to define that, and that's that.  Hah!

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